Ten minutes to safety?

Ten minutes.

Ten freakin' minutes!

Granted, it's not a big slice of time. It's a mere blink in the context of one's entire life.

But should I really have to wait 10 minutes for a toaster oven to toast a piece of bread? And, even longer if it's an English muffin?

Here's why it's annoying. When a toaster is involved, it's usually during a meal that tends to be rushed. How many people grab breakfast running out the door in the morning? Or take lunch as a quick break from work?

That's why the "10-minute toasting" is a problem. It's an inefficient, nonsensical waste of time in a world where time is increasingly the most important commodity.

It hasn't always been like this. Until about five years ago, my toaster oven browned that bread, or bagel, or English muffin, in no time. It was wonderfully fast. Granted, the toaster oven wasn't the most attractive appliance, but that's another story ...

About five years ago, Nancy and I replaced that good old reliable - if a bit worn - toaster oven. Here's where I learned that not all are created equal. Suddenly it took twice as long to get some bread browned. At first it was just an acclimation issue, but increasingly became infuriating.

I thought it was just that particular brand, an appliance brand that I have since learned to avoid when it comes to cooking implements. So we replaced it. And I learned that it wasn't any particular brand - no sir, this was apparently a trend.

The new toaster oven, now about four months old, takes even longer. So long, in fact, that one day I finally timed it. You got it - 10 minutes!

Now, I understand why this has all occurred. Anyone living in our modern society can figure it out. One or two people got drunk, put something in a toaster oven, passed out, and burned their house(s) (or apartment(s)) down. And, of course, they sued the appliance maker - because it obviously was the toaster oven's fault - and won.

The manufacturers responded in an expected way - they drastically reduced the power of the appliances. So now the rest of us have to suffer through interminably long waits just to get a piece of toast. Heaven help the poor parents who have to wait on a painfully slow toaster oven while their hungry kids screech away in the background.

No, 10 minutes isn't a big slice of time in the grand scheme of things. And maybe this is really just all about impatience. But people are more pressed for time more than ever these days, and having to wait so long for something that used to be so quick can register pretty high on the aggravation scale.

It just seems like another example of responsible people paying for the actions of the irresponsible. No, I can't prove it, but the hunch is pretty strong. Let me give it some thought. After all, I have 10 minutes while my toast gets done.